The weekly question in halacha is presented by OnlineSmicha.com
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people are so focused on yichus and treating bts and gerim as second class citizens that I would be surprised if anyone actually marries the person the bas kol declares for them…
I heard that the Rebbe Rashab said that a bachur should look for in a shidduch primarily 4 things and in this order:
1) yiras shomayim/tznius
2) good midos
3) seichel
4) meshichas halev/ physical attraction
Thanks Rabbi for the insights. They are a big help.
Yaakov Mark
No need to spell correctly with a bissele gelt
What about the ability to spell?
if the boy or girl are otherwise solid, well adjusted kind and frum… their’re personal merit helps them get the right shiduch and to stay clear of anyone who has the wrong values such as placing yichus first!
provided that he/she is jewish and Has the IKARIM listed in post 4
good question
there are some conditions which do not interfere with ones ability to have and raise children
however there are other conditions (phisical and mental) which absolutely DO preclude one from being able to have a happy/healthy/functional family
and those who are so challenged need first to seek appropriate treatment to the point where an a (trained certified) expert renderes them capable enough not to ch”v ruin the next generation
whats about” yihus”
in the frume world if you don’t have Yihus
they don’t even look at you!!
and those with some physical or emotional deficiencies are not entitled for shidduch?
1. Has fear of Heaven
2. Good Middois, Kind, compassion, Humble, Refined,
3. Once the couple meet there MUST be attractin of the heart (hamshichas halev)
4. Health: Emotional and Phisical
Not to check carefully for the above is reckless and dangerous
mazel tov rabbi for your daughter!!
ONLY!!!!!!!
gelt helps