Dec 2, 2009
More Shidduch Names Needed

LubavitchSingles.com is requesting more names to be added to the handy shidduchim list. "Most names in 2009 came through COLlive readers."

LubavitchSingles.com, originator of the Lubavitch bochurim and girls shidduchim list, is requesting for more names.

"Almost every Lubavitch family uses the lists in the quest for a Shidduch, if names are missing from the lists - those people may have less of a chance of finding a Shidduch," says the founder who remains anonymous.

He is asking people to "take a moment to help our fellow friends and family find their Bashert."

COLlive.com published the same request in January 2009. "The most names came through your site," the founder said.

Browse through names in LubavitchSingles.com and add any names of single boys or girls that are not included by clicking the "Add A Name" link.

Please fill in all the fields in the form, we cannot add the names unless it is complete.

To add many names at once or to help us in any other way please email us directly help@lubavitchsingles.com

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Opinions and Comments
1
very true,
and u know what maybe there is a shidduch for you that is waiting so all you young guys and girls
log on there!
(12/3/2009 6:08:54 AM)
2
great idea
any way you can put a contact number or e-mail next to each name????
(12/3/2009 6:27:28 AM)
3
The lists
On both the Girls list and the Bochurims list, I noticed many names of people who are married, even for a few years already. Everyone should go through the lists and when they see a name of a person that is married, then email info@lubavitchsingles.com and get that persons name taken off.
(12/3/2009 6:39:20 AM)
4
Don't waste your time
Chabad match is a waste of time, and raises false hopes and expectations for singles. None of the matchmakers there do anything to try set up people who have spent time and effort writing out their profiles thinking finally a chabad dating website but I and my friends have been on it for 2 years and I never hear from any shadchanim

Its only useful if you need specific information about someone, and he/she happens to have a profile on chabdmactch, then it comes it useful

I know other non lubavitch dating websites like chabadmatch that the matchmakers are constantly trying to suggest ideas for people by going through profiles and seeing what might be a suitable match .

It's a wonderful idea but so much more can come out from it then is actually being done
(12/3/2009 6:53:51 AM)
5
what for
What is the point of making a list of random people you know nothing about?
(12/3/2009 7:09:49 AM)
6
#2
lol how about addijng them on facebook while we're at it?!
(12/3/2009 7:18:35 AM)
7
please answer someone
a well known shadchan when i asked for suggestion
he/she sent me the bochurim list.
so, #1 - thank you so much shaddcan :(
#2 what does one do with so many names?
someone please answer.
(12/3/2009 7:42:51 AM)
8
shidduch crisses
IF PARENTS WOULD JUST LET THEIR DAUGHTERS MARRY WHO THEY WANT, THERE WOULD BE A MUCH SHORTER LIST!!!! Perants let your son/daughter make the decision!!!!!!!! PLEASE have mercy,and trust in your children!
(12/3/2009 7:46:52 AM)
9
#6 its not kosher
facebook is treif
(12/3/2009 7:57:54 AM)
10
totally agree with No.4
Number 4 is 100% right!! My 2 girls have been on Chabadmatch for over 2 years now, with clear, distinct profiles;NOT one single shadchen has ever ever contacted us with a suggestion!!!!! What on earth is the point of adding on even MORE names , if they cant cope with the few they have now. . and nothing ever happens. . and I talk for many of us;
Disappointed and disallusioned;
(12/3/2009 8:07:33 AM)
11
Not so sure...
I heard the founder of LubavitchSingles.com does not put on names if he disagrees with their parents political positions.
(12/3/2009 8:13:46 AM)
12
Not so random
The list isn't of random people you know nothing about. It is a list of people you might know about. It is only the first step. You will have to do some homework. Sometimes they are people you forgot about because they were learning/working out of town. The list will remind you of their existence.
(12/3/2009 8:28:06 AM)
13
To #5
That is what the shadchanim do anyway. They try to make shidduchim for people they know nothing about.
(12/3/2009 8:52:20 AM)
14
I used the list
as a parent this list was very helpful

it helped us to find the age of the chosson and if he has siblings under or above him

another good use: say you are impressed with a parent of brother, you can always check up for available siblings
(12/3/2009 9:00:36 AM)
15
wow
HA! how did my name up there. i never put it on
(12/3/2009 9:37:22 AM)
16
TO 11
That it absurd, there are people from across all aisles that are on the list.

I do know that he will not put on divorced people because "they are not single". whatever...
(12/3/2009 9:40:37 AM)
17
nu?
ver iz de macher az hut gemacht di website?
(12/3/2009 9:46:54 AM)
18
me too
Chabadmatch is fine in theory. . but thats as far as it goes. . more effort is needed to match the profiles, by the shadchanim, and then approach the parents/girls with a CONCRETE suggestion. . which can then be followed through; it would appear from the above comments, that quite a few of us feel about this really strongly. . and no wonder . . so thanks , but no thanks
(12/3/2009 9:48:05 AM)
19
chabadmatch...
the way chabadmatch works is, you have to go thru the "partial" list of shadchanim and contact them, some respond right away, others it takes a while and some just dont.
The reason chabadmatch was made was that the shadchanim have access to full profiles and can make suitable matches instead of just throwing the usual list of names, the problem is they are still throwing name, now they come with profiles.
I spoke to a shachan and she said she'd email me some suggestions. Now, it doesnt really matter what I want, the point is, she sent me 6 names, one guy shaved, the other wanted shlichus, the other wanted kollel, the other became frum 2 years ago....i doubt there is anyone out there who wants a guy who became frum 2 years ago, shaves and wants to learn in kollel and go on shlichus....those charactristics dont go with each other at all. she told me to sort it out myself. Had she read my profile to begin with, she may have sent me one of those suggestions, if none at all.
(12/3/2009 10:13:24 AM)
20
lol (??)
Its either you laugh or you cry!!!
To ''chabadmatch''(above) you cracked me up!! and if the whole situation wasnt so sad, it would be laughable; but the problem is, that it IS so sad. . because if there is officially a Chabad website for our boys n girls, then surely it would be amazing if something would come of it, rather than names n profiles be thrown at us at random; the profiles are written so clearly that with some care and time, surely someone out there could do something to make something happen positively;
Ad Mosai, ad mosai ad mosai
(12/3/2009 11:27:46 AM)
21
An idea
I think the best way to go about it as a parent is as follows: tackle onle country/ state at a time. Take all the English boys, call up a friend in England, and get a little info about each. Then c if any are shayach. If not tackle another small place... If u c a shdchan isn't calling u, y should your child lose out? We need to take matters into our own hands! Good luck.
(12/3/2009 11:34:48 AM)
22
know the difference
Chabadmatch is a dating website where users pay to submit profies and view other profiles. The bocherlist is a list of bochrim and the girls list is for girls and it just gives the names, approximate age, and city. Both can be useful. The bocherlist gives ideas. Ask people who know the bochrim, (or girls). I do know people who went through the list, found a name that they were interested in, got info, redd the shidduch, and married the person. Anything can be an avenue for finding a shidduch so don't discount anything.
(12/3/2009 11:40:16 AM)
23
Chabad Match is a shot in the dark, you don't know what surprises lie ahead.
The best suggestion is an open forum like this one here.
Let's say like this: I myself have a 22 yr old daughter, she's chassidish, she went through the lub system, and is seeking an easy going kind of bochur between ages of 23-27. She wants someone locally anywhere between Syracuse and Monsey, something like that. And then I'd like to leave my email: striemel@hotmail.com
(12/3/2009 12:09:06 PM)
24
ENGLAND IS NOT A SMALL PLACE
(12/3/2009 2:39:08 PM)
25
to # 16
#11 accusations sound a little off, but unfortunately their are about 25 "aisles" in Lubavutch (Vaad, Rabanim, Shmira, Mishichist, nitzigim, merkez etc) there is no way that you could have checked to make sure he has people on every side of every Aisle.
(12/3/2009 3:11:01 PM)
26
chabadmatch is okay
My son is marrying a girl whose profile was listed, and a shadchan sent the profile to me. The shliach to every shidduch is unique to that shidduch. No way is completely right or wrong- you have to try everything.
(12/3/2009 3:18:49 PM)
27
Privacy
It's such an absurd briech of privacy, for anyone to come and view the names, it's shocking!
(12/3/2009 4:17:14 PM)
28
hmmmmm... and i thought..
wasn't shiduchim made by g-d?
and if someone isnt on "the list" their chances are less?? what happened to our faith? don't we believe that the fact that some get married later than other is dictated by g-d???
or am i just getting old!!!
(12/3/2009 4:35:58 PM)
29
Divorced isn't single
Imagine you are a girl just out of sem and a shadchan gives you a good name. Then you find out he is divorced. He wears a kapota,gartel and tallis and still has to go to court every two weeks because the horrible girl he was married to before is suing his pants. It was obviously the other side's fault and this young man is the gretest catch ever. That is why they offered him the most horrible girl the last time. He was only married for 3 months (or was it 3 years?) and it doesn't matter that he has a child because the mom has him now and it is only a baby. But baby will be big boy soon and will need child support and will come visit.
If this sounds like a nightmare you just understood that divorced isn't single.
A divorce is a very traumatizing experience that can not be understood by the fresh spouse. So do everyone a favor and keep this list for first time singles only. Unless you are ready to have your name listed with a big red DIVORCED next to it. It is only fair.
The people looking to date divorcees will know where to find you.
(12/3/2009 5:39:35 PM)
30
to# 28
G-d is making life easier for you. In the olden days you had to search the planet for your 2nd half. These days He gets people to submit names to the site so that all you have to do is look at the screen and see his/her name in front of your eyes!
(12/3/2009 5:42:08 PM)
31
Chabadmatch, the way I understand it.
First, an $18 fee does not obligate anyone to do your work for you. Chabadmatch is a tool to help you search for yourself, then you find a shadchan from those listed , preferably one that you know, to help you get more info on the singles who you think look the most suited to you.
(12/3/2009 6:18:29 PM)
32
shadchan crisis
their is no shiduch crisis! there is only a shadchan crisis!!
(12/3/2009 6:18:34 PM)
33
MOSTLY GIRLS
ON CHABADMATCH MAJORITY ARE GIRLS HOW CAN MATCH THEM ALL?
MUCH LESS BOYS GO ON CHABADMATCH
WHY?
(12/4/2009 5:23:06 AM)
34
How Do YOu Get A NAme Off?
Many names on that website are on without the consent of the person, which is disgusting. I'm single and 23 and I don't my name to be listed on some website like a classified ad. Shouldn't I have to be asked before my name goes up there?

If anyone knows how to get a name off that list please reply to this comment.
(12/5/2009 10:40:55 AM)
35
Disgusted
Shadchan's are disgraceful, the ones I have come in contact with I would not trust to match my dog, I am finding them to be utterly disgusting human beings, with no social skills, I cannot understand why they decided they had the skills that would qualify them to match hopeful young men and women.
(12/5/2009 10:46:10 AM)
36
once and for all
lubavitchsingles.com and chabadmatch.com are not connected, there are 2 different people who've made a website and both want to help. problem is that one is just a list and the other sends out profiles
(12/6/2009 12:52:31 AM)
37
to#28
Hashem gave us the computer to use looking for shiduchim so use it or you can wait 28 or 29 years with no results nobody cares .everybody talks about MUMBAY but the fact that young people are not married at 25-26-27....is no international news!!!!!!!!!!!!
(12/6/2009 2:05:03 AM)
38
to 34
Relax....
firstly it's not a personal ad page..no one put your name on cause they think u are desperate..they get lists from yeshivos and sems and put them up (you'll notice your friends are there too)..
I thought the same thing back when I was your age...but who cares....
(12/6/2009 2:24:55 AM)
39
to 34
Relax....
firstly it's not a personal ad page..no one put your name on cause they think u are desperate..they get lists from yeshivos and sems and put them up (you'll notice your friends are there too)..
I thought the same thing back when I was your age...but who cares....
(12/6/2009 7:25:30 PM)
40
CROWN HEIGHTS RESIDENT
FINALLY SOMEONE WITH BIG GUTS
TO REQUEST MORE NAMES MORE SHIDUCHIM
WHO IS A REAL CHADCHAN IN CROWN HEIGHTS????
(12/7/2009 5:37:31 PM)
41
chutzpa!!!
tried adding baalei tshuva names and it won't come up!!!!!! such a big chutzpa!!!! im very upset,,,
are they not a part of chabad now?
(12/9/2009 11:48:46 AM)
42
to #34
Write to Webmaster. He supposed to remove you. It is definitely privacy invasion to be listed without your consent
(5/24/2010 3:58:51 AM)
43
Use the international Shidduch Network
Chicago, CH, Melbourne, Detroit, and now Toronto, have shidduch network support groups, mostly of mothers, but singles can attend. We rely on hishtadlus, ruchnius, physical action and ahavas yisroel to help one another find proper shidduchim. "Eternal Joy" is learned, tzedakah given 18 cents daily to hachnasas kallah, names exchanged and suggested, and tehillim recited and challah taken for one another. When an engagement occurs, people physically help wherever needed: Schlep chairs, make salads for the l'chaim, host a shower, etc. Profiles sent out via internet are done with strictest attention to privacy - if the anonymous profile looks good, then the contact person gets involved. It is all very tasteful, comforting, and B"H, SUCCESSFUL. This is a grassroots operation; the main requirement is bitachon, sincerity, willingness to help others... Remember - a shidduch is a neshamadike zach -- a list is a tool, but not the key. Find a group in your city or start one! Hatzlachah Rabbah to everyone searching.
(5/26/2010 3:03:27 AM)
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