Many parents, teachers and therapists find themselves struggling with increasingly intense children. This intensity negatively affects everyone: frustrated teachers leave their profession; parents receive phone calls from school about intensity gone awry; children are diagnosed and medicated, often for the foreseeable future; and treatment and educational professionals receive an avalanche of referrals that can only worsen…until they find an approach that truly works.
On Sunday April 29, at Beth Torah, 1061 Ocean Pkwy, 9am-5pm, world renowned psychologist and educator, Howard Glasser, President of the Children’s Success Foundation, and author of Transforming the Difficult Child: The Nurtured Heart Approach® has achieved international acclaim as an essential set of strategies for transforming the most intense children (with diagnoses such as ADHD, Oppositional Defiant Disorder (ODD), Autism, PTSD, Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD), Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder and more, by channeling their energies in inspiring ways – without the use of medication. The event is organized by Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT and MASK.
According to Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT, “Parents and teachers alike need to learn new and positive strategies for motivating their children at home and in the classroom. Unfortunately, many parents of children with ADHD, learning disabilities, ODD, don’t know how to handle their kids with intense behaviors. Howard Glasser has proven he can help motivate kids with ADHD with positive reinforcement and it really works!”
Faced with problematic behaviors from an intense child, most adults react by cranking up their level of application of traditional, conventional methods. They don’t realize these methods are virtually guaranteed to make the situation even worse. This isn’t the fault of the parents or teachers, or the intense children themselves. The culprits are the methods most people have at their disposal. With a powerful enough method, the same life force that has gone awry can be the very source of greatness. The Nurtured Heart Approach® was developed from my work with the most challenging and intense children. School and treatment centers report that it not only positively tranforms “difficult” children but has the same impact on more cooperative children as well.
The Nurtured Heart Approach enables adults to quickly experience great impact in helping children channel their intensity into great choices and great qualities of character and leadership. Those who have studied this approach become agents of change in their homes, schools, agencies and programs. They inspire those around them to interact with children in a new way that acknowledges and amplifies greatness in every area of those children’s lives. Join us for this workshop to learn how to light up the runway for children with all levels of intensity. Let’s help the more intense child discover that he or she is no longer “the bad kid” or even “the good kid”— but the great kid, with great things to contribute; and let’s help all children recognize and build on their greatness.
Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT, and Rabbi Y.Y. Jacobson will also be presenting at the conference.
To register for a full day training with Howard Glasser and a parenting lecture with Rabbi Daniel Schonbuch, LMFT visit www.ItWillBeGood.com or call 646-428-4723.
For the parenting track visit www.maskparents.org
One reason there are “suddenly so many intense children” is that there have always been these behaviors. But unfortunately, many were beaten, threatened, punished until a particular behavior ceased. That is a superficial tactic that more often than not leaves the child’s inner sensibilities damaged. Later on many need therapy, or lead unfulfilled lives, or treat their own children in unhealthy ways, or act out in any number of negative ways. There is a saying: “Just because you have silenced someone doesn’t mean you have convinced him”. Well, just because you have silenced a child or managed to curtail his… Read more »
Why are there suddenly such a huge number of “intense” children? r/l
It is one of the scourges of the era of social media & needs to be addressed as such.
Otherwise everything. done to deal with the terrible situstion is nothing more than a bandaid
What a blend of Torah and practical tools -?yaasjer koach to the organisers!
will there be recordings available for those out of town?
Could you please give specific examples of some of the “frightening examples” specifically resulting from the method referred to in the article? I personally have seen frightening results from uneducated, misinformed disciplinarians, but positive results from the method referred to. Also, I think the Rebbe would see a lot of similarities too. Maybe he would add dimensions to make it relevant to Chasidus. I believe he did so in other situations if he saw it as a healthy and effective way with nothing contrary to Chasidus. Unfortunately, there are so many “intense children” treated in harmful ways, under the umbrella… Read more »
While i would have to request permission to post his name, I heard from a very Chassidishe Chinuch expert that this is ‘the closest thing to the Rebbes approach to Chinuch’ My son has always been a bH more intense child and someone recommended that I read this book when he had just turned 3. I really feel that it ‘saved our life.’ The conventional approaches just didnt work with him, on the contrary. Incorporating this approach allowed me to maintain boundaries while emphacizing/encouraging the positive. The increase in his appropriate, thoughtful and ‘good’ behaviors which resulted from this speaks… Read more »
Before taking on any parentingcourse one has to ask onself if there is a TORAH. element in any of it…
In the Torah there are consequences forone’s behaviour
from Addam ha rison to Moshe Rabenu onwards.
Ot teaches cildren lifeskills..coping with disappointment…everything
NO other philosophy can do it….our children are precious and deserve emes that will set them up for life’s journey .
Why dabble with anything less??
“It might be worth checking it out”???
I have seen some of the results of this one…it is frightening
I think the word “transform” here means this: A negative problematic behavior can be transformed, the child will have experienced an unconditionally nurturing relationship while the negative behavior is addressed without the typical lecture/punishment/berating/ shaming/etc., so typical in these situations. Instead of the child rebelling, bring defensive, becoming angry, bring embarrassed, etc., he-she will have appreciated the nurturing while at the same time feel safe making the “transformation”. So it’s a positive, not s negative approach. As a teacher I’ve dealt with many students this way and have found it to be effective 95% of the time. The child appreciates… Read more »
Intense or not intense. Terms like teach, help, raise, educate, even discipline or straighten out, sure, but transform is a term that suggest a lack of respect for the humanity of the child. I’m not a new school parent and I’m not a fan of any of the child led pedagogy that’s become popular and I also believe in firm demarcations of authority and enforced limits, but there has at base to be a profound respect for the child. A Jewish child is not in need of a transformation. People use terrible words like train (you train dogs, you teach… Read more »
This approach has not been studies and at best receives mixed reviews from peers. I often wondered why we don’t reach out to professionals with real clinical experience who have proof their methodologies are actually effective.