Jul 5, 2017
Mom Aims to Solve Shidduch Crisis

Mother and Shlucha Faygie Herzog created a forum for Shidduch networking which already counts 60 Shidduchim to its credit... and growing.

After the tragic passing of veteran California shliach Rabbi Yehoshua Binyomin Gordon obm, his daughter, Faygie Herzog, searched for a fitting memorial for her father.

During the year of mourning, Faygie, a Shlucha at Chabad of the Valley in California, noticed how her brothers were able to maintain an ongoing connection by reciting Kaddish three times a day, yet she felt she had no way of her own to do so.

Searching for her own outlet to do something constructive, it was in a conversation with her friend Miriam Moses, that an idea struck.

Like so many mothers with children of marriageable age, Herzog and Moses were navigating the world of shidduchim.

The two were chatting on WhatsApp, when Moses suggested that Herzog utilize her outgoing personality to take on the shidduch crisis.

"In a world of disruptive technology, from Uber to Amazon to the social networks like Facebook, why not apply some modern thought to the burgeoning shidduch crisis?" she said.

So Herzog, in honor of her father's birthday, took inspiration from one of his hallmarks of helping to inspire others.

"My father always taught people to set their minds to something, and to think big!" Herzog says.

Taking up the challenge, Herzog started an international Chabad Shidduch group via WhatsApp, creating a networking forum for mothers and Shadchanim.

Within hours of the launch, 25 mothers had joined the group, posting a picture and short profiles of their children.

Overnight, Herzog's phone was burning up with requests to join from all over the world.

By the second day, the group had reached almost 100 people. Herzog's own daughter Dina's Shidduch was one of the earlier matches that evolved, clocking in at number 14.

Now, a year later, the group "Rabbi Gordon's Shidduchim", fittingly named in tribute to this remarkable Shliach, counts over 60 shidduchim to its credit in one way or another.

In fact, following the incredible success, demand is so high that a second group has now launched and literally hundreds of mothers are participating.

To join the group, contact 818 401 3620.



Most Read Most Comments


Opinions and Comments
1
Mothers only?
What about people that represent themselves?
(7/5/2017 4:25:49 PM)
2
Great Idea
Very exciting, this is a game changer.
Thank You for doing this
(7/5/2017 4:44:36 PM)
3
yy31
Faygie, thankyou, you do your group in such a positive way, with so much ahavas yisroel and with a real emesdike way.
(7/5/2017 5:26:59 PM)
4
Reply to number one
Same question. Specifically older singles.
(7/5/2017 5:48:40 PM)
5
People must begin to care!
Totally agree that there is a shidduch crisis but as I try to ask people if they know someone for this one or this one I see people are not caring. There are a lot of singles, older singles, young divorcees from different backgrounds and aims. If the friends, acquaintances start to ask around and think of those people the crisis would be less severe.
(7/5/2017 5:57:50 PM)
6
Jono and faygie
We love you
(7/5/2017 6:05:41 PM)
7
boy/girl
how many boys vs girls?
(7/5/2017 6:43:22 PM)
8
Shidduch
Where's the link to join ?
(7/5/2017 7:01:07 PM)
9
combine
I hope there will be a way to combine the info from one group to the next.
(7/5/2017 7:43:35 PM)
10
shidduch crises - my take on it
stop dating so many times for so long! seen so many potentials fizzle away due to thus. wring advice being given out by mashpias saying the Rebbe was for it... well just came across a letter in the igros with clear direction from the Rebbe with him saying that too much dating leads to complications!
(7/5/2017 8:08:21 PM)
11
We do NOT have a Shiduch crisis
We have a Shadchonim crisis!
Most of Shadchonim will not take their time to get to know the girl or a bochur. I don't see how the "Shiduch Crisis" can be solved if Shadchonim are picking names for suggestions out of a hat...
(7/5/2017 10:27:38 PM)
12
to # 10
I personally got an answer from the Rebbe after not being sure if I should proceed (this was the 4th time on the third round with the same Bochur) "By you and by others, 4 times is not enough, Go out again" to the best of my recollection.
(7/5/2017 10:53:57 PM)
13
Reply to number one
Same question. Specifically older singles.
(7/5/2017 11:47:43 PM)
14
Chabad friends
Agree with #11 shadchanim are choosing for YOU
and they tell you it's Bashert ... they push you and they make you pay lots of money !!
(7/6/2017 12:12:19 AM)
15
to #1 and 4
ask a shadchen on the group to represent you
(7/6/2017 2:00:41 AM)
16
to #1 and 4
send a picture and short description to Feigi and she will post your profile
(7/6/2017 2:03:42 AM)
17
wonderful!!!!
see number 11 also 5 and 8
(7/6/2017 4:10:32 AM)
18
My take
I think the problem is deeper than difficult communication with a shadchan...it's in the parties & their families. It's been said so many times before, but I'll just use bullet points to simplify:

* Interfering, yichus/money seeking parents
* Parents who lie (age, weight, education)
* Both genders wanting LOOKS first
* Wanting MONEY
* Wanting SHLICHUS
* Wanting YICHUS
* References that are bad - they lie or sabotage
* Boys intimidated by educated girls
* Girls don't want an electrician or teacher etc
* Both being closed-minded without even meeting
* Family issues - SN siblings, divorced, BT, Geirim

I'm sure there are many more. But none of these should be obstacles if you do your own histadlus as well. Look for the quality of the candidate, forget the gashmius or the name. If the family isn't so ayayay... so what? As long as they aren't crazy or destructive, who cares?

It hurts me to see so many fine young people entering their 30's or mid-late 30's who are stuck. Everyone needs to help.

Speaking of which... I am NOT a professional Shadchan, but I know a few amazing young people who are more than ready: ISO of an American-Israeli girl for a Chabad 24-year old. He is fully bilingual, extremely responsible and has an excellent career. Living in Israel is non-negotiable.

A beautiful 31 year old Israeli Chabadnika, professional, looking for a man who is Chassidish & won't be scared off by her intelligence. Willing to relocate to NY.

These are people I personally know. If you are interested feel free to contact me.

May we be zocheh to marrying off all our children to their zivug now.

Hindy Lewis
(7/6/2017 4:10:58 AM)
19
It's a problem that can largely be solved by coaching.
When singles realize that very often THEY are sabotaging the process because of fears, expectations, despair etc, then they become FREE TO CHANGE THINGS.. instead of being VICTIMS of the system. Whe you are accountable you are also liberated.
(7/6/2017 6:10:36 AM)
20
jobs $ for not married
just another idea, maybe, maybe not married people need help finding jobs, because seems like job is a top question for shadchanim, jobs in the community, so they can be around others, maybe helping out of towners get jobs in the community...

also, maybe cheaper yeshiva education for not married vs married...
(7/6/2017 7:12:48 PM)
21
#18
Hindy Lewis, how do I contact you? Have a 25 year old girl, extremely intelligent, made Aliyah 2.5 years ago?
(7/6/2017 7:55:06 PM)
22
Kol Hakavod
Kol Hakavod to Miriam Moses who since this Whatsapp Group started -.has started numerous other groups and is totally devoted to the Inyan. May we share many more Simchas and the ultimate Simcha of Moshiach Now!
(7/7/2017 1:30:02 PM)
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