By COLlive reporter
An article in the upcoming Tishrei issue of the N’shei Chabad Newsletter highlights the emerging reality among young Chabad couples to settle in frum Jewish communities.
The article written by Rabbi Mordechai Lipskier, a young teacher and mashpia in Crown Heights, explained that “the primary objective of this article is to raise awareness of our current state of affairs.”
Here are excerpts of the article titled “Training the Second Brigade”:
At the groundbreaking for a Chabad yeshiva not long ago, the dean opened his speech with, “Every year, this yeshiva educates 150 students who will eventually move out on Shlichus!”
His words were met with resounding applause. But I must admit that I was saddened. Not only because his statement was false, but because his words embodied a major injustice to the students in his yeshiva.
Over the past 70 plus years Chabad has become recognized as the symbol of Jewish outreach, so much so that our very identity has become synonymous with Shlichus.
This is true not only from an outsider’s view but from within our own communities as well. “You’re a farmer” is a familiar taunt given to someone who doesn’t move out on Shlichus. To be a chossid, we argued, you must go out on the Rebbe’s Shlichus.
There’s no doubt that our Shluchim have changed the world for the better and are indispensable. There’s also no question that the motivation to go out on Shlichus is due largely to the way we educate our children with the Rebbe’s vision.
Our families and educational institutions have successfully trained the Rebbe’s army of Shluchim. And it goes without saying that there’s still a need for new Shluchim.
But it’s time for a reality check.
What percentage of our boys and girls are going out on Shlichus these days? A fraction of the number that used to.
This phenomenon may be due to several factors—including fewer available Shlichus positions because of the number of Shluchim we already have ka”h—and doesn’t reflect a lack of interest or motivation. But the fact remains: The majority of our young couples are settling in frum communities and working regular jobs.
If we continue to live in denial, convincing ourselves and our children that a Chabad chossid is exclusively someone who moves out on Shlichus and that most of our children will in fact do so, we will fail our children, the Rebbe and the world.
It’s time to reawaken a dormant art: The art of being a chassidishe baal habos.
Just like our Shlichus-training permeates every aspect of our education, training chassidishe baalei batim and bal habostehs should do the same.
Core values for every Jew, and especially a chossid, include: Trust in Hashem; studying Torah every day; davening in shul three times a day; performing mitzvos b’hidur; dressing like a chossid; giving tzedakah; farbrenging; and, of course, reaching out to others and strengthening Yiddishkeit.
For a baal habos this can mean engaging in mivtza’im activities while on business; inviting non-Torah-observant guests for Shabbos and Yom Tov; and hosting shiurim and farbrengens.
It’s vital that our boys and girls are aware of these values—their beauty, importance and relevance.
This article and others about Lubavitchers who had a near-death-experience appear in the new issue. Subscribe now at nsheichabadnewsletter.comor buy it on Kingston Avenue.
You’re so right, zalman deitsch was a great example for a chassidishe bal habos. I read the book on him, it’s incredible and should be mandatory reading for every older bachur!
I don’t think the author’s point and your’s are the same. He’s focusing on strengthening our baalei batim and your focusing on the chisronos of shluchim.
How true so many of you have spoken!! Those on “shlichus” please don’t teach your children to feel higher then their classmates whose father might b supporting yours!! Arrogance was not something we were taught -rather humility and hakarAS HATOV!!! And shluchim who are genuine believers –why when the new young couple moves out to spread yiddishkeit -so many are welcomed with “you are in my backyard –and then taken to a din Torah?!” There are so many lost Jews who have not been reached and if you truly believe that Hashem provides then we should all trust and welcome… Read more »
This piece is very good and one can even add and expound upon it. Just realizing that shlichus is and was always meant for – to reignite the Jewish spark, bring people closer to the Rebbe, spread Chassidus and all other actions that make people realize that there’s a G-D in the world, would automatically put people in the mindset of solving all of the problems that the article mentions, and indeed prevent them from coming about in the first place. But how sad it is to see people trying to take this article and fit it to an agenda… Read more »
Wow, and finally someone so refreshingly honest.
The educational system promotes a fantasy, where the contestants are basically told at “the finish line”, “every man for himself”. How dishonest, in the guise of chassidishkeit. That’s why so many of the younger generation are running away from you. They see right through the lies…
now we need to find a way where the younger generation can if they wish become doctors lawyers accountants computer analysts etc while at the same time not compromis\ing their commitment to Torah and Chassidus.
The schools throughout Lubavitch need to offer the necessary programs to facilitate this reality of the times.
Core values: Ahavas Yisroel in the family and community, simcha, davening at length with kavvanna, and desiring to observe halachic nuances to the best of our ability
It seems that you and the author are saying the same thing in other words. And it’s quite possible that people will understand his down to earth words easier than the oisios they’ve been hearing for years. Proof’s in the pudding: we haven’t gotten the point all these years! Love you man.
I live in Crown heights and strive to do what the author says to be a chassidishe ball habos and be mekushar to the Rebbe, while Shlichus is the ultimate level, it doesnt mean that if im not official makes me less of a person or chossid!
Not everyone is a Shliach according to Merkos, I get called the name “Farmer” which is not nice and sad
According to the Rebbe’s words (not my words) chayai Sara 5752 . We all are appointed by our commander in chief. The only difference between you and the one who is “official” is you have the Shlichus every spare moment. The official shliach is 24/7.
Rabbi C used to farbreng on this very topic. We r talking like 12 yrs ago.and at one point I was so tired of hearing the lies and I stood up and said something along the lines of “rabbi C, what about those of us that don’t have the connections and money to get those positions that ur relatives get? What about the fact that places are simply not available unless u go knowing there are only 2.5 Jews and no money so u basically going out to suffer financially and be alone and not doing much. Putting ur family… Read more »
This is not just an issue now… this has been an issue for a few decades… children from frum families that aren’t interested in going on Shlichus have been made to feel “less than” for many years. Chabad has not been good at creating a supportive environment for children that don’t fit the Shlichus mold. It’s great that someone is writing about it. Better late than never. I was raised in a frum Chabad home. My father was a mohel, shochet, sofer… but doesn’t have smicha, and is a bal teshuva. We were not treated as equals in the community… Read more »
thanks for this op-ed.
keep on publishing thought-provoking op-eds.
Here is my contact info so we can talk as we are looking for Shlichus.
The Shliach oseh Shliach horror stories are where one or both of the parties are not mentchen, when you are it’s a pleasure for all.
please text 646-807-9150
I remember as a child… I don’t remember which year but one day a sign saying “Chabad house” appeared on the front door of our house (in the middle of an anash community). This was right after the Rebbe said a sichah. Our life had changed from being just a frum and chassidish family to a family that now focuses on the outside – a beis Chabad.
Every chossid is a shliach and should use every opportunity in their personal and professional lives to do our primary work of yefutzu maynoisecha chutza.
Every student coming of that yeshiva is a shliach, and he knows it!
It doesnt always mean opening a chabad house in no-man’s land, but also at work or any other place and situation u find urself in.
someone who is chabad knows he is ALWAYS on shlichus, and thats his #1 priority!
A lubavitcher who works is not a baal habos, but a shliach of the Rebbe who’s place of shlichus is in the workforce.
Hatzlacha, moshiach now!
The rest of your story is either you remain the same for the next 50 years of your life, or the rest of your story is you stop the boo hoo hoo self pity crying, and jump into the world and do something…. take some loans, speak to mevinim, open a store, start a buisness, go to school, DO something tomorrow morning that will be the 1 st day of a new life.
Hatzlocha Rabbah!
We are on shlichus many years. We could perhaps afford a new couple (my kids don’t want to come so far) but we are terrified of all the negative stories we have heard about Shliach oseh Shliach. It’s not so easy. Why bother. Who needs that extra stress in an already stressful life.
We may change our mind but doubtful. Wish it were easier and less messy
The above article seams like there are two different people a Shliach, and a baleh bais.
I am 20 now, and I learned that the opportune way is that they are one in the same.
Hatzlacha
If you are raising a frum Chabad family, have a good marriage to a loving, supportive wife, your kids are healthy…. how can you possibly be a failure? You are BLESSED, far more than you could imagine!
Don’t be envious &/or resentful of others: you have no idea what their lives are really like. This is the path Hashem wanted for you – now it’s up to you to do YOUR Shlichus, even in your “low-paying job”.
I feel your pain. I’m sorry you feel rejected by your friends because you did not go on shlichus. You are not a failure. Hashem has a plan and shlichus for every one of us. Your job is to figure out what Hashem wants of you in your current situation. I want to add that a certain tzubrochenkeit over not being on shlichus is not a bad thing as long as it spurs you to do more and more. It took me many years to come to terms with not being a shliach, I’m finally in a place where I… Read more »
This is a 20 year old tragedy and BH it is starting to be addressed. Let’s start with a moshel. It would be wrong to describe Hkb”H is being exclusively gevurah. There are psukim to point to that show that Hkb”H is gevurah but we also know there are sfiros bmiluim and that as much as we have a mitzvah of yidias alokus, it’s impossible to fully understand alokus. Chabad and our Rebbe are multifaceted. There was a perversion of the Rebbe’s words to make Lubavitch exclusively or even primarily an “outreach” movement. Learn the Rebbe’s Torah and notice that… Read more »
Reality check – there’s still Great shlichus – and there are so many Jewish troops in need for you.
Bonus: benefits for you and family – a salary, housing, medical, electric and more.
Think about it.
In certain years one of the criteria for the the rebbe to be mesader kiddushin by a wedding was going on shlichus.
In the yeshivish world the girls are hocked a chinik they have to marry a big lamdon the future godol .eventually they come to terms with reality and have to get jobs.unfortunately some of them who aren’t erlech try and stay Inn kolel forever and send the wives to work while they pretend to be the aspiring godol.the seminaries teach the girls that everyone has to marry a godol .
Yes we need to support our own daled Amos first! But! I personally feel the need to give to shluchim who are (the ones that I give to) are moiser nefesh for the Rebbe’s cause. It goes without saying that I pay my fair share locally. We need Moshiach big time and that we are want to see happen now!
Great discussion. We are all one family.
We can certainly always use that boost and agreed that there is such a “perception” there are both and we have both. That being said. 1. If it’s only a perception… Than who really cares if ther than maybe educating those who have the perception that they got it wrong. 2. By becoming Gedolim we will not get out of golus. The very definition of a chossid is the opposite of Gadol… A chossid needs to be a chariot to the one above and to the directives of his rebbe. Yes we should know Halacha! Yes we need to increase… Read more »
It’s true that you can do a lot while working regular jobs, yet we don’t see it happening much. The reason being that your reality as a worker is very different then a shliachs relality. You see yourself as a emploee, they see you as their coworker, and it sets the tone. Shliach has a certain aura to him that is very real for people he encounters. Think about it in terms of armature vs professional. Who you rather be dealing with? So I say to young people with shlichus aspirations: if you can, pursue a real shlichus. The life… Read more »
I live in a frum community and run a pseudo Chabad house from my home. We are not Shluchim but have a small sign on our door that says ‘Chabad house’. We have Shiurim in our home and we host many a traveller passing through. We have Friday night and Shabbos meals and have many guests. We emulate a Chabad house and do as much we can to emulate the Shluchim including Mivtzoim and general Yidishkiet for those who aren’t as lucky as us. The reason why we do this is probably our upbringing. Who would we be if were… Read more »
To all that everyone is saying… The beautiful part here is that if you read the comments – everyone is overall being very respectful of each other and positive! THIS positive attitude is how we will get out of Golus! Nothing is perfect and human beings tend to run the institutions – it goes without saying the G-d runs the world in every detail – he created that humans make choices. Wo nobody is perfect and therefore we will not focus on what isn’t right but rather what is right and how we can be doing it even better. Moshiach… Read more »
The reason why it looks like less are going on Shlichus is because the head Shluchim give all the jobs to their children. It’s called nepotism!. My son has BH a good kop who learnt seriously in Yeshiva for years, got Semicha, and taught in a Mesifta before marriage. Shlichus was very important to him. After leaving Kolel he could not find anything more worthwile than fundraising! He had no “Protecksia”, he now works in a very basic low paying job! He is very bitter that within Chabad disscussing about a Parnossoh is considered a lack of Emunah! He has… Read more »
Unfortunately this article has been written too late. I’m a married guy whose dream was to go on Shlichus. When I was a bochur the mashpiim and friends who I would go with to the Ohel for shabbos would tell me that Shlichus is the end all be all. As I grew older and got married in my late twenties and both my wife and I got more comfortable living in crown heights, I felt like there is something I want to pursue but can’t due to personal reasons. But as time has gone on and my family has grown… Read more »
Reb Mordechai,
As a dear friend and admirer I beg you to change the syntax of your wording, and instead of introducing a new fragment in Chabad, please convey the same beautiful message in a positive sense by using the words of the Rebbe (from 5746 an onward) that today EVERY YID is a Shliach.
Based on this, please convey your long overdue message with far greater success.
Zalman Deitsch AH is an example of someone who was first and foremost a Chosid, Yiras Shamayim and Lamdin. He was a businessman who was a Shliach. The author is correct. We need to educate our Talmidim that even if you are not sent on Shlichus you need to be a Shliach/Chosid and a Torah Yid. Our yeshivas fail to teach that. Their only message is Shlichus or you failed. That therefore rejects 80% of the Talmidim who do not become official Shluchim. The yeshivas need to teach the Talmidim of the need to learn, daven, teach, Farbreng, do mivtzoyim,… Read more »
This article is long overdue. Very true. Just to add – lubavitchers in crown heights NEED to support the mosdos in Crown Heights instead of giving to shluchim. The mosdos in Crown Heights are suffering because people are supporting shluchim elsewhere. Please support your community first!
What we need more of are people who…I wouldn’t use the term gedolim…will be a ‘not an am haaretz’ There is a real perception out there that the chosidim of chochma, bina and daas are lacking in those areas.
Agree heartily with 15 and 16. We have produced a generation of children with unrealistic expectations, often ill equipped to deal with the demands of every day chassidishe life. Appropriate education is the key to all this. It’s the way out of a poverty trap and section 8 housing.Hashem indeed provides for us but we must make the kli. 27 has a useful practical suggestion . I also respectfully suggest the whole shlichus system needs an overhaul. We need to move out of the ‘shlichus for all my family members’ to a carefully planned viable model. hopefully all of these… Read more »
Sadly most shluchim who have anash communities close by do not associate with them out of fear that their chabad house might actually become a frum place
Our worldwide lubavitcher communities have grown. And sadly to say, those anash communities need leaders. Many qualified couples go out on shlicus but each anash community needs qualified couples to connect with and lead the young couples in our communities. (and the old couples and the children). In our community there was a young couple waiting for a shlichus opportunity and while waiting they began connecting to and having farbrengens, etc for young couples and it infused vitality into our city. But then they left and didn’t listen to me when I tried too convince them to stay, Maybe some… Read more »
Someone who remembers the accurate details of this story is invited to post. Someone (probably a Lubavitcher chossid) suggested to the Rebbe that the lubavitch community be divided in to two parts. One would go on Shlichus while the other would support them financially. The response to this was: We don’t have the manpower. Given the facts on the ground that a growing percentage of the yungeleit getting married are taking on the method of living as discussed in this article, we need to all wonder if what we’re teaching in our schools is correct. This is a fair summary… Read more »
I have 2 kids on Shlichus, the rest are working & supporting their shuls, community… and their siblings on Shlichus. Unless you are prepared to go to places like Sudan or Mongolia, OR papa is a Shliach & has been holding a spot for you since birth, the chances of you getting a Shlichus are slim-to-none. Nepotism is rife, whether or not the candidate is suitable; you only have to read the appointments on COL to see how it works these days. I agree with #30. My children are in places where the locals take advantage of every program they… Read more »
This is such a vital point that was well written and articulately expressed. We hear so many stories about alter chasidim who were immense ovdim and most of them probably had jobs like normal people. An unfortunate outcome of the “go on shluchis and if you can’t, then you can have some worth by supporting shluchim” is that guys that grew up in the system end up with a very low sense of self worth as a chossid, which usually feeds into a decline in their own standards of learning, hashgafah, chassidishkeit, etc. As Lubavitchers, we need to feel proud… Read more »
I am on Shlichus and feel happy and blessed to be doing this but know many amazing and highly qualified younglayt in this position and such an avodah should really be recognized, valued and appreciated. Thank you!!!! PS: If such families would settle in smaller Anash out-of-town communities they would also make a huge difference to their communities and beyond.
Bsd
Just like the Rebbe Rashab named the yeshiva he founded Tomchei Temimim because the Tomchim are also part of the yeshivah so too the Tomchim of shluchim are also part of the shlichus of the Rebbe.
I have a dream to go on Shlichus, although this was not ingrained in me as a kid or very much in yeshivas. Rather purely from learning the Rebbes sichos you see how the Rebbes will is that kids/bochurim should yearn to go on Shlichus. a Sicha chayei Sarah ’47 (I believe) comes to mind where the Rebbe says “we should tell all temimim become Shluchim and go conquer the world with yidishkeit”. although many of anash do not end up going on Shlichus, I don’t believe that this should not be an ikar of a chasidishe chinuch. there is… Read more »
It’s the working people, Lubavitcher and non-Lubavitcher alike, who support and sustain the shluchim. The shluchim could not do their work if they did not have people to fundraise from and people who give generously on their own . It’s a partnership. People would do well to elevate the status of the working “business” Lubavitchers since couples wouldn’t even go out on shluchus unless they know there are those that will support them financially!
I recently saw the term used when a new couple went out on shlichus , “joining the family of shiluchim” !? The term was always used as the family of chassidim chassidem ain mishbochah ! & should stay that way we are all one family all the rebbe’s chassidim shliach or not ! & we should continue to fabraing together share simchas together make shidduchim together just as it always was before 3 tamuz !
Shlichus is a way of living, that is the chassidishe Baal habos
Bh I have thought about this for years . The solution would be to create a shlichus out of work force To create a organization of the bale batim who wish for shlichus to do so at work . Give shuirim . Give our matza . Mezuza. Put tifilin. Organize a chanuka party Purim party . Create a Minyan for davening etc Figure out how to make a sivivo where u work . There is a lot more to this idea in how to create a network of all the lubavitch yungerliet at work, not only in nyc but global… Read more »
So beautifully written.
There are Shlichus jobs for everyone who really wants is capable and is cut for Shlichus
Maybe is not your “Dream Shlichus ” but there is something if you really really want just Shlichus
Maybe your real Shlichus would be a businessman or who knows
Active duty military chaplaincy is a great opportunity for those seeking to do shlichus work.
It comes with a bonus of a fixed salary, health benefits, housing, gas and electric benefits and much more.
This article is amazing. as a Shliach I have struggled with being in the position I am in. When I went out you were a failure if you didn’t go on Shlichus. Wish I would have read your article and had the support you are giving to so many when I went out.
There is tons of kiruv that needs doing in our “frum” communities. Aside from the unaffiliated Jews that live next door and wait behind us in line at the supermarket and need a shabbos invitation – we are losing our youth! Why is shlichus in our own communities less important than shlichus in another community?
The truth is everyone is a shaliach in their own way. The Rebbe himself said that every Jew is a shaliach in their community. Of course some are zocheh to be “official” shluchim and they do great work, but the fact is each and every Jew, and certainly each and every chassid, is a shaliach for whatever it is they are meant to accomplish, whoever they are meant to inspire etc. it is time that we all look up to what we do and not feel we are less than others. Hashem needs every Jew and the Rebbe loves every… Read more »
Seriously #2 you are delusional. Salary? Parnassah? Most Shluchim have neither and are swimming in thousands dollars of personal debt from Shul expenditures.
our yeshivos don’t train shluchim. they train Yidden. in fact, there is no formal shluchis training. How would a yeshiva where the graduates become shluchim look different than a yeshiva where they become business men look? it wouldn’t.
Just to add: there are many ‘farmers’ who are truly working on their avoidas Hashem and Hiskashrus raising wonderful chasidisher kinder.
Agree. However what you wrote about is the basis for the definition of a Chossid – period. The fact that a chossid is “full time” on shlichus or not… isnt what really matters. What matters that we are chassidim, yireh shomayim and follow the Torah and Chabad Chasiddus. The whole purpose why Tomchei Temimim was established was for the sole purpose that the Chayolei beis dovid will bring the Geulah! So you are truly corect in what you write about being a chossid… but we can never be satisfed and we need to ker a velt (begining with our own… Read more »
Aside from instilling chasidishe hanhogos, we must educate our youth towards “working regular jobs”, though “regular” jobs may not be sufficient to pay for the rising costs of housing and tuition. Therefore, we must educate out youth towards working great, high paying jobs, and that requires a good education (includes secular studies).
Kol ha Kavod to CHYE for somehow addressing this new phenomenon. We still need to begin this type of education much earlier in children’s lives.
Concerned Parent
Why is the Lubavitch boys educational system still in denial, denying students of a basic secular education K-12, when they now more than ever, need those skills to compete in the general workforce?
The system offered that back in the 80s, when I, along with some of the most successful Shluchim today, received a fully accredited high school diploma from our schools. Not coincidentally, we also now see the effects of this lack of much needed change, with so many kids going OTD.
You can be a chassidishe Bal Habos and still do the Rebbe’s shlichus. This is about spreading the teachings of the Bal Shem Tov. This is needed especially in all the frum communities.
Be a real yid.
Get a job and serve Hashem.
Hashem will send you a different shluchis every day.
Don’t give up hopes. In the search for shiduchim for my daughters bH there were a few bochurim who are determined to go on shlichus…there are constantly new jobs of shlichus…different maybe then they used to be, but surely if this is the Rebbes iker rotzon, it has to work out!
Broche vehatzlocho !
I’m in the same boat as you are, but I’m not compromising. Don’t let anyone define your standards; a lot of people want girls married ASAP, but I know many who did just that and ended up divorcing. Be careful and also know that boys with a Shlichus mindset are almost always frummer.
Besoros tovos! If you sincerely want to go on Shlichus, I believe the Rebbe will send you the right chosson and the right place bekorov! Yogati umotzosi taamin!
wow, feel the love, you guys got to get over it and start to live like Jews, Life is too short and there is so much to do. so many young people are going off why? Why are you so quite about this problem? So do any of you have an answer about this ….
The concept of shlichus is not exclusive to those who go to places and start Chabad Houses, Chabad on Campus etc. One can be a ba’al aboss, a businessman and as pointed out in the article fulfill the duties of a shliach in so many ways, including supporting financially those who are away from their home towns and doing their shilchus there. If the a potential chosson or kallah is making the criteria of their getting married based purely on shlichus or else, well. I am not sure that would be the view of the Rebbe. Please correct me if… Read more »
I have lived 20 after gimmel tammuz in a frum community. I never married the right family or had the yichus to go on shlichus. Today its impossible to go on shlichus without the money and connections. I do mivtyoyim weekly no big hur rara and i pay my own expenses for it. Very rewarding and I know it gives the rebbe nachas.
Well said.
Boruch Sholom Wolf (striving to be a chossid in New Hyde Park NY)
The famous student of the alter rebbe binyomin kletzker was a very very successful lumber merchant.
Thank you Rabbi Motty for writing this. I am one of a few guys in my class who weren’t zoche to go on Shlichus and I feel like a 2nd class citizen. Just as an example to illustrate and echo this point. one experience I have is when my friends come in to Ny for the kinus every year, they usually make a farbrengen shabbos day in someone’s house (I’m usually not notified about it and I find out after shabbos, one year I was told by accident while walking home to make kiddush on shabbos day, I understand and… Read more »
Half the shluchim moving out on shlichus nowadays are not doing the real shlichus of once upon a time that involved real mesirus nefesh and giving up on every day necessaties. Now pple just move on shlivhus bc its a status and source of parnassah… Its easy to move to a fulyl settled community in america with a school and everything kosher & get a salary from the shluchim there and work for them. Im not saying that the shluchim dont do amazing work. Believe me they do! But its just a point to bring out that majority of the… Read more »
I am a girl in shidduchim now, I’ve always wanted to go on shlichus, it’s presented as the only option in schools, camps, etc and of course who wouldn’t want to do the best option!! Yet my mother and other people who care about me are trying go gently convince me to be more “open minded” because the fact is that it’s very hard, almost impossible, to find a shlichus these days – and to find a guy who wants it as well, in my experience. It is TOUGH and disillusioning!!
nice cover picture!!!
I belong to a small but beautiful anash community & have been saying exactly this for a number of years
The idea of a chasidishe baal habos as was the norm years ago was almost extinct with the wave of shluchim over the decades, but as mentioned it has changed and we must bring this idea back, that we have chassidim who are not shluchim but are frum chasidish, farbreng and so on