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Thursday, 27 Adar I, 5784
  |  March 7, 2024

Why Judaism Abhors Child Abuse

Rabbi Adin Even-Israel (Steinsaltz) in a landmark article: Child abusers may be liable for the most severe punishment of karet (כרת). Full Story

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agree with #32
February 9, 2016 4:41 pm

Remember, he who is merciful to the cruel will end up being cruel to the merciful.

to #30
February 8, 2016 5:45 am

Excuse me. The molester committed an unspeakable act on an innocent child, and you are more worried about embarrassing him than about protecting other children from him?!

What “other choices” are there that GUARANTEE that the molester will not harm other children?

to #26
February 7, 2016 9:40 am

i understand you and feel sorry for your story.
may hashem help you and your son and your hole family get healing very soon.

to #27
February 7, 2016 9:38 am

maybe in some cases there is no choice. but in many cases there are other choices before posting his picture and embarrassing him and his family . please read # 21 and #24
.

Can the editors get a response from Rabbi Steinzaktz
February 7, 2016 12:44 am

As to where is it mentioned in the parsha?

to 18
February 5, 2016 2:09 pm

Chabad Rabbi’s in Australia needs to read this !!!

to #21
February 5, 2016 12:15 am

Unfortunately there is great naiveté in the frum community about this behavior, people imagine that “counseling” and shinui hamakom will result in the perpetrator refraining from future molestation. Sadly this is not what happens, it is too powerful an addiction. I don’t want to give enough details to identify the case I have in mind but tragically a perpetrator who is merely counseled and moved out of his environment, as has historically been the most common response, typically goes on to molest in every subsequent environment until law enforcement enters the picture. Whoever knows of molestation and does not inform… Read more »

To #22
February 4, 2016 11:35 pm

I am sorry I appear to be judgmental.

Perhaps, after having my only son abused in summer camp and then dealing with his endless suicidal attempts, years and expense of counselling, falling out of Yeshiva, distancing from Yiddishkite, adding enormous stress on immediate family and spousal relationships, navigating through the turbulent legal system, and personally looking into his bedroom each night not to see whether he was sleeping but to see whether he was still alive, has an effect on someone’s sense of reality and judgement.

to #23
February 4, 2016 4:13 pm

i’m sorry but i don’t think you understand this illness nor recovery from it. i’m not blaming you. i also didn’t understand it as well as i do now after studying it and talking to many people suffering from this and similar disease and working the program of recovery.

to #23
February 4, 2016 3:16 pm

bottom line: there are still other ways to stop the abuser without embarrassing his family. what would you do if your son or brother or father was an abuser? the program of recovery for all addictions are in principal the same. with time the obsession becomes removed. though he has to always be vigilant because its not gon. for example: an alcoholic has to be careful not to have even a small lechaim because he could go down the road. but his obsession and urge to drink could definitely be removed. the abuser is powerless over having control. he can… Read more »

#21 - There Are No Guarantees
February 4, 2016 1:41 pm

No mental health specialist will tell you that the “sickness” is guaranteed to be cured. One may learn to better control their impulses, but they do not vanish, according to research in this field. It is a constant struggle for those with this mental illness, and there are relapses, G-d forbid. A warning is no guarantee either it will stop. Also, I don’t think it matters whether one abused because he or she was “mentally ill” or has a terrible yazar hara, The point is that they abused another person – and had a choice who and when to abuse.… Read more »

to #20
February 4, 2016 1:31 pm

Before being so judgmental perhaps you take a good look in “your mirror” and decide if you would want your faults to
be publicized and embarrass your family!

to #20
February 4, 2016 9:57 am

1) i would thing that in most cases family members do not know that someone in their family has this sickness. 2) ‘sickness’ means that the sick person is not in control just as he is not in control when he has chas vesholom a physical sickness. this is a mental disorder and no rational thinking will stop him if he has a bad case of this illness. 3) but thank G-D there is help available. and only professional help can and does stop these behaviors. 4) only professional testing can determine weather this person is really sick or he… Read more »

Who's Really Embarrassing The Family?
February 4, 2016 12:56 am

People write that they are concerned about the “protectors” of our children embarrassing the abuser’s family. Let’s get it straight! It is not the protectors that embarrassed the family it is the abuser who did. Perhaps, the abuser should have first thought how his/her actions will effect his family when he/she gets caught. Furthermore, if a family member knew there was an abuser in their midst, why did they not stop it before it became public? The abuser and the families need to look in the mirror and stop blaming others for their act of abusing and inaction to stop… Read more »

consequences
February 3, 2016 9:50 pm

if someone is “sick” and kills or steals or drives drunk or drugged or physically hurts someone chas v shalom there are consequences for the perpetrator and his or her family– same with molestation.
And the innocent must be protected.

PR Damage Control Laws in Judiasm
February 3, 2016 8:50 pm

1a. Protect thee institution
1b. Shift the blame down the hiarchy.
1c. Fire a scapegoat.
1d. PR statement that institution abhors the crime.

to #15
February 3, 2016 8:12 pm

there are different levels to this sickness. for someone with a severe level then shaming him will not stop him. this is a sickness not a bad choice that he made. he cant help him self. like an alcoholic can not stop drinking. on the other hand not such severe levels can be stopped by a strong warning. this matter should be guided by professionals in this area no different then any medical physical illness which you go to doctors. unfortunately most rabbonim or shluchim or stam frumme yidden have no idea how to deal with issues like this and… Read more »

To 15
February 3, 2016 7:37 pm

I don’t think anyone said not to call the police. The point was if you have a mature way of thinking (rather than an emotional irrational one), you would take many other steps before publicizing a perpetrator’s name, and keep that as a last resort. Besides embarrassing the family, there are also many times where shortly after an accusation is made it is proven false, so why jump to publicize it?

Sorry 7&8
February 3, 2016 6:09 pm

When a sick person is severely harming his surroundings you don’t have mercy on him. You have mercy on those who are being harmed. If shaming him is the tool that will stop him then shaming it will be.

If a mentally ill person were to start banging down the wall of your house. You wouldn’t have any mercy on him and you wouldn’t get him treatment. You would call the police.

broad definition
February 3, 2016 5:09 pm

“Child Molesters” is a phrase that can capture many levels of offenses, do all incur Karet?

Don't make it known to everyone
February 3, 2016 4:47 pm

“it is both the organization’s and society’s duty to make sure that the crimes are known and punished.”
It’s important to tell the police, but not too make the crimes “known”. Where I live, there was false allegations against 2 people, and it became public news. One of them committed suicide. The other lost his job in the school, although the police aren’t allowing the alleged victim to make any claims against anyone after they determined he was lying. The only people you need to tell is the police.

Source please
February 3, 2016 4:37 pm

As far as I know, child molestation is not mentioned in this week’s Parshah, or in the Torah at all, or even in the Talmud, Rambam, Shulchan Oruch etc.

The severity of this offense notwithstanding, it is not so simple to label offenders as being deserving of capital punishment or Koreis (arguably the most severe punishment in Torah!) without any kind of source. I would love to know the source for this ruling. Thanks.

Also strongly agree with comments 7 and 9.

Avoid embarrassment for his family?
February 3, 2016 4:18 pm

The perpetrator crossed the line when he acted on his impulses however sick he may be. He is responsible and is the cause of his family’s embarrassment and shame. We must stop blaming those who speak out. People who have the courage to disclose need our support. Families of the perpetrator need our support and compassion as well. One does not negate the other. The perpetrator needs professional help and needs to be stopped. Reporting to the authorities will help the victim, the perpetrator and prevent further victims. Thank tlu Rabbi Steinsaltz for speaking out about our halachic obligations to… Read more »

A huge fan of rabbi steinzalts
February 3, 2016 4:04 pm

As an avid reader of the Rabbi’s many books, I find it hard to believe that he personally wrote this article. He usually offers much sounder logic and brings citations for what he says. It was likely written by someone else.

Two-Sided Evil
February 3, 2016 3:55 pm

Its equally important to know WHO and WHAT to believe
as unfortunately there are evil characters out there
who take advantage of this topic for their own agendas to
harm others. Such elements are deserving of punishment
no less than the accused.

to #7
February 3, 2016 3:51 pm

you are 100% correct!

???
February 3, 2016 2:54 pm

a molester is a sick person. he needs help. he needs therapy. you don’t punish a sick person. you definitely don’t punish his wife and children and parents etc. you make sure he gets the necessary help and of course that he is not in a position to re offend. but all this can be done in all cases or at least in most case or in many cases. a strong effort should be made to avoid embarrassment for his family

Thank you!
February 3, 2016 12:44 pm

Thank you to a Chabad Rov for making a point that we have been making for years. It is time to stop protecting, or making excuses for child molesters. The passage of time doesnt forgive their sins, and they should always be held responsible. Rabbonim that think otherwise need to step down and not lead any community.

Professor Benny Forer

Make sure the person doesn't re-offend.
February 3, 2016 11:56 am

Rabbi Steinsaltz notes, “We must make sure that such a personal never again be in a position to repeat such offenses.” How does this get accomplished in the forum community? By giving the offender an office job? By sending him to another community? Where are the teeth in the treatment of the offender, outside involving civil authorities? RCH

Mehiecha Dantuni
February 3, 2016 11:46 am

With respect:

“There are some objective reasons why such things happen quite often in religious institutions. Children are taught and trained to be obedient and to accept their elders as authorities – which makes it so much more difficult for them to resist abuse or to report it”, clearly implies that it happens more often among the religious Jews than goyim.

The author is a chochom (though there is a modern tendency for chochomim to use their expertise in one area as currency to opine in others unrlelated…)

Mehiacha Dantuni?

Sources are always helpful
February 3, 2016 11:23 am

I wonder what is the source to apply the punishment kart to a molester. Additionally, how does he determine that the way to prevent such a thing from happening again is by publicizing the crime? Is that the punishment he is referring to?

Interesting
February 3, 2016 11:16 am

Where in Mishpatim is this discussed? I would like to look it up.

our children are our guarantors
February 3, 2016 10:38 am

We must protect them first and foremost

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