By COLlive reporter
In 1976, a young high schooler felt the need to push back against the expectations and strictures of life as a Lubavitcher girl born in Oak Park, MI, and learning in Crown Heights.
Being open enough with her father, Michigan Head Shliach Rabbi Berel Shemtov, she told him how she felt.
“He did not over react, he did not get upset,” she recalls in an interview with JEM’s My Encounter project. “He said, Why don’t you write a letter to the Rebbe and tell him how you feel? Ask for his guidance in what you should do.”
The Rebbe’s sensitivity and approach to her predicament remain as topical and incisive now as ever – truly a guide to the perplexed.
Today Mrs. Mariashi Groner is the Co-director of Lubavitch of North Carolina and the Director of Charlotte Jewish Day School.
@#1 Write to the Rebbe, you will be answered. No doubts!
amazing and insightful.
thank you for sharing real honest feelings you had.
this story illustrates the power of honestly speaking about painful or upsetting thoughts and feelings to a trusted and objective individual.
These days, finding a person the child likes and is willing to have contact with once a week or periodically by phone just to talk or even to learn lightly might do wonders to help a child over a rough spot. Also, parents yelling and getting nervous is definitely not going to help. Kids have to feel our love; it is not personal to the parent.
It is a level of sharing we all need to do.
But let’s also give thanks to JEM for bringing this story from Mrs. Groner to the world!
Tfs. I hope this has a widespread influence on others. I also remember you from Bais Rivkah, in sem,, lovely and charming, and never would’ve guessed in a million years that you went through anything like this. May you go from strength to strength in your shlichus and continue to receive all the brachos from the Rebbe. Moshiach today.
Thank you for sharing this encouragement with us. I am sharing this with a 13 year old who is currently going through a hard time. Thank you!
Will be willing and happy to “confide” in the Rebbe knowing that nobody else will see their letter , and the Rebbe can help.
Incredible story !!!!
Thank you so much for your emotional honesty. So many people try to hide their feelings and give the impression that they have it all figured out. I remember you from your youth and would never believe you had those feelings.
hey Mariashi, hi, this is your old friend who knew you when you were 16 and living at your grandmother’s, Mrs. Korf, on Kingston Avenue.
I imagine it wasn’t so easy to share this very personal story and letter with the world.
Thank you for doing so
Rishe
Of course you are write that it was good times. It is extremely sad that we cannot get such a directed and personal answer now, but there is still alot that can be learned. 1. Knowing who her father is – a chosid from the old generation, it is impressive to find out that his children had that kind of relationship with him, where they weren’t afraid to disappoint and knew that they would get a loving response to such a statement. 2. The suggestion that her father gave her, can only be given on top of a very strong… Read more »
Our teens should pay attnetion to her story and especially the Rebbe’s answer to her. I think it would help them as well to get beyond their confusions and doubts about Torah and Yiddishkeit. Thanks Mrs. Groner for sharing that answer and lesson from the Rebbe. You may never know the riply effect of your courages message and story. But thanks to you, many may find their paths in this difficult world we live in. Thank You
Wow Rabbi S really had it easy back in the day. Instead of what we would do these days, break our heads and try to figure out what to do and deal with the situation, all he have to do is tell her to write in and the situation was taken care of. Wish I can do that now with my rebellious children.