One Very Special Retreat

by DL Mishulovin

Cerebral Palsy. Spina Bifida. Blindness. Deafness. Down Syndrome. Autism. Cystic Fibrosis. Seizure disorder. Retardation. Etc.

All these, and undiagnosed syndromes, are the diagnosis of children in my very close family. Yes, my family.

Chassidim Ein Mishpocho. And as Shluchim of the Rebbe, we share an even closer bond. Now spice that with those of us who, Boruch Hashem, have children with special needs. (Thus was created the ‘nebach club’. No, I’m joking.) Thus was created, “Yaldei Shluchei HaRebbe”.

I just had the wonderful opportunity to attend a retreat, in Running Springs, California, coordinated by Sholly Weiser, of “Yaldei Shluchei HaRebbe”. And wow, that was some experience. The truth be told, I was not so eager to join. Can you imagine a room full of parents of special needs children? Will they have enough tissues? I wondered. Way too depressing, I thought. However, it was anything but.

As a matter of fact, we laughed. And we laughed a lot.

At his welcoming speech, Gershon Sabol, chief honcho of “Yaldei Shluchei HaRebbe”, said that when this organization was started, they mainly provided us with some financial support. I then interrupted him and [jokingly] said, “And we thought you were going to take our special children for a bit”.

Chuckle, chuckle.

They aren’t going to take our children, but they are here to make our challenges a tiny bit lighter. Just taking a break, being together with others in the same boat; sharing ideas and sharing Hashgocho Protis stories and laughing! was a relief and so beneficial.

“We are Shluchim. Shluchim are tough. And Shluchim are givers!”, proclaimed our Guest Speaker, Rabbi Adler, who came to share with us his personal journey and impart practical advice. It is hard for us to ask for help. But with these special children, we need help, and “Yaldei Shluchei HaRebbe” is here to assist us. Their motto? “We’re here for you, and if you won’t call us – we’ll call you [to see if there is anything you may need or want]”. Coordinator Sholly Weiser compared it to a Mashpia/Mushpa relationship, “There are some Mashpiim who wait for their Mushpa to call on them. The better ones though, call their mushpas and check in on them.” That is “Yaldei Shluchei HaRebbe”.

Yes, these special children have special neshomos and these conditions, syndromes etc. are only on the surface. When Moshiach comes the outer layer will fall away and we will be able to see their holy source. But at the end of the day, the caring for them is still extremely difficult. We are faced with challenges we didn’t think we would overcome.

At this get-together we heard amazing Hashgocho Protis stories that leaves no room for doubt that these are truly very special children. Even the detailed Hashgocho Protis leading up to their births are unbelievable. As one mother expressed, “This is definitely the Rebbe’s child!”

In every step along the way we see, in a very revealed manner, how these are the Aibershter’s very dear children and He is taking care of them. I mentioned to the other women that I believe that my child’s one-on-one aide was created solely for my child. “Oh, and I believe that my caregiver was for sure created for my son too”, responded another mother with conviction.

I was wowed by everyone’s miracles. How can one not be? How can one not be inspired after hearing, thence seeing, that He is truly our Guiding Light.

– Rabbi A. gets a call on YomTov from the hospital [that his very ill child is in]….He rushes out to the hospital and takes along a sefer on Aveilus…..Boruch Hashem he didnt need it.

– Rabbi M. recounted how had he and the doctor not been exactly where they were when they were….who knows what the condition of his wife and newborn baby would have ended up, r’l.

– And what happens when Mrs. S. needs to deliver her special needs baby and they are sending her to a hospital that she doesnt want to go to? The Aibershter plants some infection in the NIC unit of that hospital and they are forced to shut it down. Mrs. S. gets to deliver her special baby where she wants to. How often does a hosp. shut down their entire unit?? As often as the Aibershter wants.

– Jr. Shliach puts Tefillin on his specialist and two months later, before his next appt., the Dr. had passed away.

– The special teenage boy who is so proud to be part of a minyan. Never mind that he cannot read but he surprisingly can follow Krias Hatorah.

– After enjoying a party (and receiving gifts) for special needs children and their families, one of the siblings said to the other kids in the family that they need to thank their special sister for this fun time. Says another sibling, “We need to thank Hashem for giving her to us”.

After hearing Rabbi L.’s journey to different specialists around the country. I questioned him, “And where do you get money to pay for these specialists?”

“That’s a miracle in itself”.

We shared experiences, we shared ideas, we shared our resources and more.
We shmoozed, we laughed, we relaxed.

We spoke the same language.

We appreciated the fresh air, the mountain view, the atmosphere and more.
We so enjoyed the respite we so deeply needed.

We understood each other like no one else can.

Thank you to all those that made this retreat happen. (Where do you get the money to pay for this? Miracle?)
Thank you “Yaldei Shluchei HaRebbe” for giving to my family! My very close family.

May the next get-together be in Yerusholayim; where we will bask in the holiness or our special children – the yaldei shluchei haRebbe!

Moshiach Now.