A child’s first haircut is definitely one worth documenting: barbershop photo or video and maybe even a lock of hair for a keepsake. But for Mendel Tiechtel, his first haircut is a party. The kind with cake, cookies and other goodies.
The spring-themed celebration, complete with flowers as centerpieces and kiddie garden tools as utensils, is part birthday party, ancient ritual and graduation. Add them together and you get the Jewish tradition called upshernish.
“In Judaism, we believe very strongly that a child is like a tree. In order for a tree to grow properly, it needs to be taken care of from the moment it was harvested, from the moment you plant it,” says Mendel’s father, Rabbi Zalman Tiechtel. “Same thing for a child as well.”
Meaning, simply, that by the time a boy is 3, he has received the nourishment needed to have grown to the point where he can begin formal religious training.
The beginning of that training is symbolized with the upshernish, or the boy’s first haircut. During the haircut, which is performed by friends and family members during a party in the child’s honor, the child’s side locks, called the payot, stay intact as per tradition.
Another change taking place at age 3 is the boy begins to dress differently — wearing a kippah (skullcap) and tzitzit (tassels hanging from his shirt).
The first person to cut Mendel’s curls at his upshernish was his mother, Nechama, who, along with Tiechtel, runs the Chabad Jewish Center, 1203 W. 19th St.
“I’ve been educating him since he was born, but now it’s official,” says Nechama, mom to Mendel and siblings Mina, 4, Yosef Meir, 19 months, and Levi, 2 weeks. “The concept of educating a child just means so much to a parent. So, when he turns 3 years old, it’s like one of those very momentous occasions.”
That occasion also includes a display of some of the education he’s had already — with boys like Mendel reciting a few words of Hebrew and lines from the Torah.
So, why the age of 3? Tiechtel says that that’s the age when a child has enough perspective to understand that his education has begun.
“The time that the child really makes that transition from just doing things to understanding a little bit and finding real relevance in everything, that’s when a child turns 3,” Tiechtel says. “That’s when a child begins to have a little bit more maturity, clarity — to gain understanding about what things mean in life.”
Little girls have their own version of the ritual, but instead of the haircut, they begin to light Shabbat candles and dress demurely.
The next stop for a party of this magnitude for Jewish boys like Mendel is 10 years later at his bar mitzvah, which signifies his entry into adulthood and responsibility for keeping all of the Torah’s commandments. For a girl, this happens at a bat mitzvah at age 12.
“In fact, at the end of the party we invite everyone to come to the bar mitzvah, you know, we know when it’s going to be, when he turns 13,” Tiechtel says before joking, “The wedding, which is after that, that we don’t know.”
and Kansas -Missouri….. you have more Simchos to look forward too.. Men vet Tanzen fun ein Simcha zu ah anderen…Just wait till Mayer Neveler Itkin from Chabad on the Plaza has opsheren…. if not in Yerushalim then it will be in Nevel Sheh B”Missouri…. und dorten vet men trefen 96… Feteh fleish… shmaltz herring und far trinken vet NIT ZEIN coca cola nor pickle juice U’Kedoimeh…. vais farvos? voil ot ot ot {Ve Reb Zalman Shur zu120 zogt} de Kleine Mayer vet iberkeren ganz Chabad on the plaza… men vet shoin nit darfen dee alleh taivos… Dee Higer Plazaniks.. zai… Read more »
Mazal Tov Dinish! The kids all look adorable KA”H and we’re so proud of you!
Your friends all over the world
he looks sooooooo cute
i bet he is!
i hope you grow up to be a tzaddik and a talmud chachum
and live till 120
omen!!!!!!!
go jayhawks 2011
ur the best!!! mazal tov! an amazing shlucha, we can all learn from her!
mazel tov. sorry we missed your simcha. your chabad house has been transformed and is ready for moshiach. it looks great, very warm and welcoming , pam and david
Mayer Neveler itkin… Koidem kol varf avek de gopel… In Nevel hot men dos nit gedarft… vehoikur… az du bist a nomen nochen Elter zaide… und men meint dir oich Harev Tichtel… ich zeh nit a bootel 96…mit feteh Fleish… Mach Kansas …Nevel!!!! Mazel Tov Mazel Tov!!!!
MT teichtels
Mazal Tov on the upshern, the new baby and continuous success in your shlichus!
Hope to see you guys soon!
Chezky, Rivki and kiddies Rodal
Mazal tov for the opsherenes. Everyone looks really nice. The party looks well attended and inviting.
Nice to see cousin Mendy Weinberg there also
Go Itche and Chabad of Kansas City
stunning bbaby! many simchos!
I think All Upshernishes should be posted with pictures just like weddings. ( maybe even all simchas).
he is a real cutie!!
That’s what all Chabad Rabbis do! They invite the whole Jewish community in their city to come to their simcha.
chabad rabbis are so warm and caring; it is so touching he shared his simcha with the whole community.